- Hey, Boss. Are we gonna do anything else on the Twinkie beat? The Internet is blowing up with people talking about Hostess going under.
So I’ve noticed, Geoffrey. People are having so much fun talking about how much they’re going to miss Twinkies that they seem to be completely unaware that they’re rehashing the same jokes from when the company nearly crumbled last summer, or like it did back in 2009. In fact, their love of saying “OMG HOW AM I GONNA EAT TWINKIES OMG ZOMBIELAND ZOMG TWINKIES” is drowning out any legitimate concerns for the thousands of employees who’ve lost their jobs because the company’s top executives gave themselves such fat pay raises. The loss of the Twinkie isn’t the real tragedy here. Fuck. Little Debbie still makes Cloud Cakes which are the same damn thing. The tragedy is that Hostess is blaming their employees for their own greediness and throwing them under the bus.
- That would make a great visual! The Hostess CEO throwing the line-workers under a big Twinkie-shaped bus.
But the Twinkie can’t be the bus in this metaphor. The Twinkies have been thrown under the bus along with the employees.
- So how about that whole Israel/Palestine conflict? Have any ideas on how to cover that?
*sigh* So, you were thinking something like this?
- Well, it’s not your best work, but if it means we don’t have to weigh in on Gaza, then I guess it’ll do.