Modern Primate

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  1. MARRIAGE EQUALITY HEADER

    Marriage Equality Avatar Efficacy

  2. cheerleader header

    Mail Bag Wednesday – “Cheerleader”

  3. what every man should know header

    What Every Man Should Know

  4. MAIL BAG SICK DAY HEADER

    Mail Bag Sick Day + Bonus Puppy Footage

  5. STEUBENVILLE VIDEO 2 header

    The “Gray Area” of Rape Culture

  6. R-WORD HEADER

    The R-Word

  7. health header

    Misogyny’s Impact On Health

Health

  1. Fox News Launches Women’s Magazine!

    foxnewsmagazineheader

    Does your woman get jealous when she sees you reading a news website? Does her tiny lady brain find the layout of most news sites too confusing? Well, Fox News has the solution!

    Fox News Magazine is a new kind of news magazine, custom-tailored to the habits and interests of a woman. With a layout inspired by Pinterest, her delicate mind won’t have any trouble navigating features like Brooklyn Decker’s Beach Secrets, 8 Steps to Really Clean Windows, How to Keep Mealybugs out of your Flour, and other articles relevant to her unique lifestyle as a housekeeper and a wife.

    Read More »

  2. Testosterone Alone Does Not An Athlete Make

    semenya

    Three years ago, South African sprinter Caster Semenya came under scrutiny when the International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) demanded she take a gender test, leading to the discovery that the 18-year-old woman had a pair of testicles where her ovaries ought to be, despite carrying two X chromosomes and an otherwise fully female anatomy.

    Since that time, the IAAF has created a policy requiring that women with “unusually high” testosterone levels either take drugs or undergo surgery to compensate for what they feel is an unfair advantage.

    The problem, aside from an obvious invasion of privacy, is that the leading experts don’t even know what a “normal” level of testosterone is for a woman, nor do they know how much it accounts for athletic performance.

    Read More »

  3. Interesting Tumblr: Advice For a Generation of Men

    I found an interesting Tumblr the other day called Advice For a Generation of Men. The blog is full of earnest advice on how to be a real man’s man. You know, the kind of stuff today’s panty-waisted betas need to be told because it doesn’t come naturally to them like it does to us.

    For the most part, the blog is spot-on, but some of his advice just seems a little too subtle. So I’ve gone through some of his posts and added my own clarifications in bold red text to better illuminate AFAGOM’s subtext.

    Read More »

  4. Gummy Vitamins for Grown-Ass Men

    It’s a bold new world.

  5. The Smoker’s Perspective

    Painting by Dr. Lukas Brezak

    “HEY YOU! YOU LOOK REALLY COOL SMOKING THAT CIGARETTE” chided a megaphone-amplified voice from across the street.

    Squinting, I saw this kid, probably 19, with a look of smug self-satisfaction beaming across his face. I could tell that in his mind, he was doing a public service by letting all of the people in earshot know that there’s nothing cool about being seen smoking. In reality, he thought he had found an excuse to shout his personal judgements at people through a megaphone like a dick.
    Read More »

  6. Male Body Issues: of Scrubs and Waterfalls

    noscrubs

    The body image issues that women face is a well-trodden subject. One that I am neither qualified nor interested in talking about.

    But the body image issues that men deal with is something I think about a lot but rarely hear discussed. Male body image issues is a complicated subject and I think the best way to explain it would be to describe my personal experiences.

    Read More »

  7. AIDS-Tainted Meatballs: We’re Gonna Need a Bigger Thundershirt

    “Whitney.”

    My brother was calling me in the middle of the day.

    “David,” I answered.

    “Whitney I’m in Ms. Hoisington’s class. I’m putting you on speakerphone.”

    Ms. Hoisington was my brother’s 11th grade English teacher. She had been my English teacher six years earlier. “…Um,” I said.

    “Whitney. Tell the meatball sandwich story.”

    “Why?”

    “Because no one believes me.”

    A few students tittered.

    “Well,” I said. “Once I was worried I got AIDS from eating a meatball sandwich.”

    More titters.

    “I told you,” my brother said. I could practically hear his smirk through the phone.

    “Is that all?” I asked.

    “Yup. She thought I was making it up.”

    Read More »

  8. How to use Bayer Aspirin as Birth Control

    fosterfriess

    On Thursday, Rick Santorum funder Foster Friess made what he’s calling, “a joke” about contraception, and he’s worried that some of us might have misunderstood him.

    “Back in my day, they used Bayer Aspirin for contraceptives. The gals put it between their knees and it wasn’t that costly.”

    Read More »

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