Modern Primate

From the gentleman that sits on the committee that has continually reduced federal biomedical research budgets for the National Science Foundation and the National Institute of Health:

Todd Akin, brave christian warrior – Missouri

“If it is a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try and shut that whole thing down”

Now, feminists all over the web have been quick to critique Dr. Todd Akin, Ob. Gyn., defender of the unborn. “The vagina doesn’t work like a computer, you dumb ass – you can’t unplug it when you shove a crayon in the USB port.” But these ladies are missing the fundamental thing here.

Let me provide a diagram of the Kuhn-ian paradigmatic shift that Dr. Akin is so brave to lead us through:

image © Peake biomedical research

You see, ladies, you’re right: the vagina is not like a computer as we know it. Instead, it is a product of futuristic nanotechnology, sent to Earth to trick men into sin. Once you understand how this “Bible-based Christian” sees the vagina, you’ll understand why he also wants to defund planned parenthood.

Sexual disease is a God’s molecular robot sent to Earth, from the jungles of Viet Nam a random alien game preserve jungle planet

When asked to resign for this brilliance, which you simple peasants can’t seem to understand, Akin responded that “My belief is we’re going to take this whole thing forward and by the grace of God, we’re going to win this race”

Slow.golf.clap.

**Note: Akin is not a doctor. He just plays one on the house committee for science, space, and technology