Rom-knee-yourself-in-the-face, you’ve just been gaffing it up in the Olympic-related area left and right, haven’t you? Listen, Rom-a-lom, you can’t just toss out insults without reasonable analyses or constructive criticisms. Also, Rom-a-loma-dong-dong, you have this platform to address some serious global issues during one of the most highly anticipated/televised events. But instead, you’ve chosen to make some mean girl remarks about our foreign Anglo brethren political allies. You know, Tiffany did that to Stacey once, and then everyone hated Tiffany, and then she lost the race for class president. Read More »
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Marriage Equality Avatar Efficacy
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Mail Bag Wednesday – “Cheerleader”
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What Every Man Should Know
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Mail Bag Sick Day + Bonus Puppy Footage
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The “Gray Area” of Rape Culture
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The R-Word
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Misogyny’s Impact On Health
Posts Tagged “How to Treat a Lady”
She’s not going to want to go for the action or adventure because, hell, she’s a lady. You want a boy’s night out.
That rough voice. That sculpted body. Those plastic pecs. She wants one thing:
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One of the hardest things about dating, aside from making time for someone else, being responsible for that person’s feeling, and sharing your life with them, is answering the question, “WHAT ARE WE?!??!”
MAN, the weather right?! The heat is so hot. And the hot is so heat. And the sun is just right there in your face. And perspiration, huh? Who knew summer could be so unpredictably heaty?? Read More »
Women take snacking very, very seriously. Before we put anything in our mouths, we always ask, “Does this align with our values? Our family values?” (Reminder: all women are mothers.) Well, that answer was a strong, “NO!” when we came across this little gem from the Nabisco family… pfff family. No family company would ever make something like this:
You guys, it’s a rainbow Oreo cookie! Are you freaked out yet? Why aren’t you freaked out yet?! Don’t you know what this means? Rainbow = Gay. Gay = Rainbow. Rainbow Oreo = Gay Oreo. Gay Oreo = Gay Snacking. You are what you eat. You eat that Oreo and you’re going to become a gay. *slaps cookie out of hand* Don’t eat that! That’s how they get you! Phew. Okay, listen, if you want to keep you, your lady and your children safe: Never taste the rainbow. Luckily, this was just a temporary photoshopped stunt, so Oreos are safe for consumption again… but what about the foods that are always rainbowed?
Dear Michigan Senate and House of Representatives,
You’re absolutely right. There is a time and a place for “female-specific gentialia” talk, and that time and that place is definitely not during a debate on reproductive health. What was Representative Lisa Brown thinking dropping V-bombs like that without warning?! ‘Scuse us, we mean without warming.
You see, the problem isn’t that she said it. It’s that she used it out of nowhere. It’s like when everyone found out Ping was Mulan. You’re upset because you’re not ready, but then you’re cool when she starts saving the whole country. It’s just like that.
So to avoid another V-gate, here are some games you can play to warm up the house floor. EEE! We can’t wait to see the look on your faces. You’re going to have so much fun!!!!
Remember when you showed up on the doorstep of the woman you had a crush on and recited a moving piece of poetry to her and she fell in love with you. No? You’ve never done that? You should probably do that.
WATCH OUT. Romance is a tricky bird. And after seeing so many episodes of Game of Thrones, it’s tough to know where one romance ends and the next begins. WE KNOW. So, let’s talk about scene-setting. Years of research (read: pyros) have lead to our conclusion that romance is all about lighting. Corneas and light receptors and stuff — it’s all very scientific. Here’s where you’re asking, “When do I know it’s romance?! Are they going to come right out and say it? Are they going to say, “Look, this is romance, okay.” Well, kind of.
In this age of internet, does anyone know how to do it anymore?? To prepare for a strong mount, it’s important to make someone feel good and comfortable and safe. Make sure to take care of that. Clear some space. You’re going to need some room for proper technique. Also, be mindful of your neighbors. All that hammering around can be inconsiderate if done at odd hours.
FYI: Your mom’s a lady.
Now before you start raining down Hershey’s Kisses and floral bouquets and other pink-themed STUFF on this Mother’s Day parade, take a step back and give her the gift that someone else put together for you: coupons. All you need to do is right click + save as “momfun_momgift” + and Ctrl-P for instant Mother’s Day presents. Read More »
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